Yue Lao Oracle Lot 9 · Poor

則父母國人皆賤之。 Then his parents and everyone in the land would despise him.

The lot

Text notes (in Chinese): 旗山天后宮本等第作「上」.

Background: what the original says

Mencius says that young people who do not wait for their parents' consent and a proper matchmaker, but instead peek through holes and climb walls to meet in secret, will be looked down on by their parents and the whole community.

This conversation in the Mencius is really about holding office, not marriage. Zhou Xiao asked whether gentlemen of old took office. Certainly, Mencius replied: it was recorded that Confucius grew anxious after three months without a ruler to serve. Pressed further, Mencius said that a scholar losing his post is like a lord losing his state. Finally Zhou Xiao asked: people take office in Jin too, yet no one there is in such a hurry; if it is so urgent, why are gentlemen so reluctant to serve? Mencius answered with a comparison. Parents hope from birth that a son will have a wife and a daughter a home. But if young people do not wait for their parents' consent and a go-between, and peep through holes in the wall or climb over it to meet, their parents will despise them. The ancients did want office; they only refused to seek it by crooked means, which is no different from boring through walls.

What it means

A relationship without anyone's blessing, kept hidden from your family, carries a great deal of pressure. Right now you should choose your partner carefully and not insist on having your own way.

Reminder: Listen to what your family and close friends think before you decide.

This is a plain reading of the words and their source. How it applies to your own question is best settled with the interpreter at the temple where you drew it.

How to ask Yue Lao for a lot

1. Yue Lao, the Old Man under the Moon, usually has a side shrine inside a larger temple, such as a City God temple or a Mazu temple. Follow the temple's route: pay respects to the main deity first, then go to Yue Lao.
2. Tell Yue Lao your name, birth date and address, describe where you are in love right now, and state the one question you want to ask (for example, "Will this relationship last?" or "When will I meet someone?").
3. Cast the moon blocks (jiaobei, two crescent-shaped wooden blocks) to ask whether you may draw. One face up and one face down means yes; then pull one stick and cast again to confirm it. Many temples ask for three yeses in a row; if not, draw again.
4. Collect the slip with the matching number. Yue Lao lots are quotations from old books, so the meaning often depends on the original passage. If it is unclear, ask the temple's interpreter.

Ask about one thing at a time; the more specific the question, the easier the lot is to apply. Yue Lao lots are for love and marriage only; for other matters, use the temple's general fortune poems.

Common misunderstandings

Previous: Lot 8; next: Lot 10.