Yue Lao Oracle Lot 39 · Good

不得乎親，不可以為人；不順乎親，不可以為子。 Without his parents' goodwill, he felt he could not be a full person, without being in accord with his parents, he felt he could not be a true son.

The lot

Background: what the original says

Mencius said that the sage king Shun felt he was not truly a person when he could not win his parents' affection, and not worthy to be a son when he could not live in accord with them.

This passage from the Mencius concerns the sage-king Shun. Mencius says that when the whole world was delighted to follow him, Shun regarded it as no more than a blade of grass. If he could not win his parents' approval, he felt he could not count as a person; if he could not accord with them, he could not count as a son. By fulfilling every duty toward his father Gusou, Shun at last brought the old man contentment.

Shun's family was far from easy. Elsewhere the Mencius says his father and half-brother tried more than once to kill him, yet he went on caring for them. When the ruler Yao gave Shun his two daughters in marriage, Shun did not tell his parents, because they would have forbidden it. In the same chapter Mencius defends this: Shun married so his line would not end, which the wise count as if he had told them. The lot draws on this tension between duty to parents and starting a family.

What it means

Take your parents' views into account when it comes to marriage; winning your family's acceptance helps the match go smoothly.

Reminder: Bring your partner to meet your family and talk things through openly.

This is a plain reading of the words and their source. How it applies to your own question is best settled with the interpreter at the temple where you drew it.

How to ask Yue Lao for a lot

1. Yue Lao, the Old Man under the Moon, usually has a side shrine inside a larger temple, such as a City God temple or a Mazu temple. Follow the temple's route: pay respects to the main deity first, then go to Yue Lao.
2. Tell Yue Lao your name, birth date and address, describe where you are in love right now, and state the one question you want to ask (for example, "Will this relationship last?" or "When will I meet someone?").
3. Cast the moon blocks (jiaobei, two crescent-shaped wooden blocks) to ask whether you may draw. One face up and one face down means yes; then pull one stick and cast again to confirm it. Many temples ask for three yeses in a row; if not, draw again.
4. Collect the slip with the matching number. Yue Lao lots are quotations from old books, so the meaning often depends on the original passage. If it is unclear, ask the temple's interpreter.

Ask about one thing at a time; the more specific the question, the easier the lot is to apply. Yue Lao lots are for love and marriage only; for other matters, use the temple's general fortune poems.

Common misunderstandings

Previous: Lot 38; next: Lot 40.